<xmp> <body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d37106674\x26blogName\x3dMemoirs+of+a+Mushroom\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dBLACK\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://tanjuanxmushrooms.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den_US\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://tanjuanxmushrooms.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d8303834872963466446', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script> </xmp>
THE MUSHROOM



name : tan juan
age : 18
hometown : malaysia


PIECES OF ME

LOVES

MUSHROOMS
shopping
drawing
TURQUOISE
MUSIC
rainbows
chocolates
chinese orchestra
fairy tales

HATES

CICAK WTF
creepy crawlies
homework
COPY CATS
chinese




GREAT ESCAPES

*chelsea*
*chia chia*
*crystal*
*ee leng*
*ee teng*
*jhing huey*
*jia lee*
*jo ying*
*jun fang*
*lee mei*
*mok mok*
*ning zhen*
*pei jia*
*pei qi*
*rui mei*
*su yin*
*teik hua*
*tict chyn*
*wen huey*
*wen yuan*
*xin yuan*
*xue yi*
*yi ching*





MEMOIRS

♥January 2007
♥February 2007
♥March 2007
♥April 2007
♥May 2007
♥June 2007
♥July 2007
♥August 2007
♥September 2007
♥October 2007
♥November 2007
♥December 2007
♥January 2008
♥February 2008
♥March 2008
♥April 2008
♥May 2008
♥June 2008
♥July 2008
♥August 2008
♥September 2008
♥October 2008
♥November 2008
♥December 2008
♥January 2009
♥February 2009
♥March 2009
♥April 2009
♥May 2009
♥June 2009
♥July 2009
♥August 2009
♥September 2009
♥October 2009
♥November 2009
♥December 2009
♥January 2010
♥February 2010
♥March 2010
♥April 2010
♥May 2010
♥June 2010
♥July 2010
♥August 2010
♥September 2010
♥October 2010
♥November 2010
♥December 2010
♥January 2011
♥February 2011
♥March 2011
♥April 2011
♥June 2011
♥July 2011
♥August 2011
♥September 2011
♥October 2011
♥November 2011
♥January 2012
♥October 2012



THANKS TO

ME. kynzgerl
CODES. manikka
BRUSHES. 1 2
IMAGES. 1 2
The 2 paper heart: moargh.de
♥ Saturday, September 25, 2010 ♥
Adios, Trials!

25 September 2010

Actually, I meant that in two ways.

First, OUR SPM TRIAL EXAM IS FINALLY OVER!!!!!

After a month. One whole month of suffering, and now it's finally over. No. Wait. It's more than one month actually. I started studying for the trials one month before the month. So, that's two months. Or possibly more. Like. DAMN YOU, stupid trials. What a waste of time. What a waste of memory space.

AND I had sleeping problems during the exam. I had to toss and turn for ages until I finally fell asleep, and they weren't deep, undisturbed slumbers either. It sucked. I was SO tired.

Second, GOODBYE, GOOD RESULTS!

The papers were tough. Some of them. Okay fine. MOST of them. What WERE the teachers thinking when they set the exam papers? Some even set questions on things they had never taught us before. And they expect us to KNOW how to do them. *shrugs*

Well, no need to cry over spilled milk. I'll try harder the next time! Except that the 'next time' is actually the SPM. Which is, in approximately ... 60 days? Brilliant.

I so don't wanna think about it. And I'm graduating. I won't pretend I'm not pleased to be finally leaving this school. But there are many things I really don't want to leave behind.

Don't worry, it's not the blackbird-ridden canteen or the taaaaasty food, nor the newly-renovated toilets! Though I have to admit the toilets are a great improvement and make me more willing to go to the toilet and not try to ... uh, suppress ... you know. HAHAHA. Kidding.

I don't want to leave my friends. Every time I think of my future, I see a whole blank PAGE. I don't know where I want to go, I don't know what I want to do, I don't know what studies and career I want to pursue. I don't KNOW anything.

I still don't think that's the worst part. Wherever I go, whatever I decide to do, I'll be starting a brand new life in a (probably) a new place, with new people. It'll be so hard to get to know people, like, really know them like how you know your good friends now.

Just imagine. You hang out with almost the same few people from the same gang in your whole high school journey, and suddenly, they're just not there anymore. Still, I guess it would be fun to make new friends, know new people. But it won't be the same, right?

And I really don't want to leave CO. I'm sort of ... I don't know, lapping up all the time I have left in CO. I have to attend this Malay seminar (I know, boring!) at 10 am next Saturday. Okay. I don't HAVE to attend it. But I think it would be better if I do. Because it would probably help in my exams.

But it would mean missing 2 hours of CO practice. I still plan to go earlier in the morning, but maybe I can't, as it is really quite inconvenient, for me, for my parents.

So, that's a day missed. So. I probably only have a few, like, say, two, practices left to attend. As a Form 5 student anyway. If ... uh, wherever I go to in the future, has a May or June (or April, God forbid) intake, then I would still have a few months to attend the practices next year. Occasionally. Like my sister. Okay, maybe not as frequently as my sister.

But it won't be the same. I won't feel like a true part of CO anymore. Because I REALLY won't be by then, as I have graduated. And my two great CO mates won't be there. One of them definitely won't. I think. The other, I have yet to confirm.

From the look of things, it seems like there are going to be lots of activities in CO next year. Why not this year, whyyyy? I hope I'll still be able to take part/"witness" some of them. Before I leave.

BUT OH GOD WHAT IF I'M NOT LEAVING?!!?! AS IN. What if I don't go anywhere? Because I CAN'T? If I get lousy results or whatever. Oh crap. I'm getting really worried. And I'm SUPPOSED to be relaxing since the trials are over.

FUCK. What is wrong with me? I'm getting all sentimental, and it's a MONTH to graduation.

Arggh. Sorry. I didn't mean to say so much. I wanted to upload the photos I took at my cousin's wedding, but I'm using the laptop now and there isn't the editing program I always use here. And the mouse isn't working. Crap.

I'm ANXIOUS. About a lot of things. My results. MY BIOLOGY. Fucccccck. I made stupid mistakes. All the studying on Physics made me write sinosuidal curve instead of SIGMOID curve for the growth rate. FUCK FUCK FUCK. Every time I think of it I want to slap myself. HOW could I??!?! I should have just written S-shaped graph, like Crystal. Stupid, stupid. And my essays. I think I wrote oocyte instead of oogonium. Awesome. And I said lactic acid is converted into uric acid. Really brilliant nonsense. I wasn't gonna write that last part there. But I don't know why, I just did. To make my essay longer, I suppose. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

What kind of results am I going to get for Biology this time? The subject in which I tried my very hardest (which isn't very hard, but still) to do well, the subject I actually liked. ARRRGH.

And my English. No. Stop. Stop it. I'm supposed to RELAX.

Phew. Okay. Glad to get it out of my system. Although. No. It's not really completely out of my system yet. Sigh.

Okayyyyy. Once I edited the photos, I'll upload them. Now, I'm gonna ... I don't know. There's nothing much to do. Maybe I'll go to sleep. To replace all the lost sleep over the week. Yep, great idea. I'm exhausted. And plus, as Yi Ling said : "later panda eye all pop out". Haha. Not that it isn't 'popped out' already.


craving chocolate kisses ..
10:00 PM


♥ Wednesday, September 15, 2010 ♥
Dieeeee

15 September 2010

Yeah, so here I am again, announcing to the world, again, that I'm doomed.

I have SO many things I haven't studied for the trials, and yet I'm here updating my blog. Again.

Why can't I keep my hands off the stupid laptop! FUCK!

I haven't touched on a single page of Form 4 Physics. I haven't finished Biology. I haven't finished Chemistry. I haven't finished Add Maths. HECK, I haven't even really STARTED on Add Maths. And I'm not finished with History. Oh God.

Well, I'll just have to hope for the best.

Anyway. Went to Klang the past Sunday, to attend my cousin's wedding. I had a blast. It was only for a day, reached Penang around 5 o'clock in the evening the next day. But still, it was fun, an escape from the tedious, brain cell-killing studying I had been doing for the whole week before that.

The food during the reception was extremely tasty. YUM. Plus they contain thousands of calories. Mmm, who wouldn't love them?

So, tried out escargots for the first time in my life, and I have to admit, I kind of liked them. When I wasn't thinking about filthy snails leaving trails of slime and goo wherever they crawl anyway. Once that image appeared, I wanted to puke. Errgh.

I'll post the photos after the trials. FUCK THE TRIALS MAN CAN THEY JUST BE OVER? EVEN THOUGH I CAN'T FINISH STUDYING, I SWEAR I DON'T CARE ANYMORE. I want them to just pass quickly.

NINE MORE DAYS. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.



craving chocolate kisses ..
11:27 PM