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THE MUSHROOM



name : tan juan
age : 18
hometown : malaysia


PIECES OF ME

LOVES

MUSHROOMS
shopping
drawing
TURQUOISE
MUSIC
rainbows
chocolates
chinese orchestra
fairy tales

HATES

CICAK WTF
creepy crawlies
homework
COPY CATS
chinese




GREAT ESCAPES

*chelsea*
*chia chia*
*crystal*
*ee leng*
*ee teng*
*jhing huey*
*jia lee*
*jo ying*
*jun fang*
*lee mei*
*mok mok*
*ning zhen*
*pei jia*
*pei qi*
*rui mei*
*su yin*
*teik hua*
*tict chyn*
*wen huey*
*wen yuan*
*xin yuan*
*xue yi*
*yi ching*





MEMOIRS

♥January 2007
♥February 2007
♥March 2007
♥April 2007
♥May 2007
♥June 2007
♥July 2007
♥August 2007
♥September 2007
♥October 2007
♥November 2007
♥December 2007
♥January 2008
♥February 2008
♥March 2008
♥April 2008
♥May 2008
♥June 2008
♥July 2008
♥August 2008
♥September 2008
♥October 2008
♥November 2008
♥December 2008
♥January 2009
♥February 2009
♥March 2009
♥April 2009
♥May 2009
♥June 2009
♥July 2009
♥August 2009
♥September 2009
♥October 2009
♥November 2009
♥December 2009
♥January 2010
♥February 2010
♥March 2010
♥April 2010
♥May 2010
♥June 2010
♥July 2010
♥August 2010
♥September 2010
♥October 2010
♥November 2010
♥December 2010
♥January 2011
♥February 2011
♥March 2011
♥April 2011
♥June 2011
♥July 2011
♥August 2011
♥September 2011
♥October 2011
♥November 2011
♥January 2012
♥October 2012



THANKS TO

ME. kynzgerl
CODES. manikka
BRUSHES. 1 2
IMAGES. 1 2
The 2 paper heart: moargh.de
♥ Thursday, July 31, 2008 ♥
Died, But Not Going To Heaven

31 July 2008

I cannot believe it.

I CANNOT BELIEVE IT.

My mum actually booked a flight to ....














BALI.















No, I am NOT kidding.















AND NO I'M NOT GOING ALONG.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. FUCKKK.

She's going with a bunch of her school colleagues.

(I'm wondering how come so many people like to go to Bali these days. I know, it's gorgeous. I read many blogs, and so many of the bloggers went there!! And I'll admit it I feel so so soooo jealous. When I looked at the gorgeous private villas and all. Errgh.)

When she told me she booked a flight to Bali, I was like, huh, who??!?!

Then she said, "Me!"

Then I went crazy. "I want to go!! Yerr!! Can't believe it!! I want, I want, I want ..." *rambles on during the whole journey back home from school*

And she said I wouldn't want to go because she's going with a bunch of her old friends.

Old, as in, the AGE, not the, uh, "status" of their friendship.

Well, I suppose some of the teachers who are going are quite old.

And for someone like me, they wouldn't make good company. But of course!! I'm a student, they're teachers, end of story. And the ... err, age gap is a bit too much.

But the views at Bali are so damn fucking gorgeous I wouldn't even want to look at the teachers' faces. Yeah, it means that if I have the chance to go along with them, I would. Okay, umm, only maybe if I can take a friend along. Someone .... nearer to my own age.

Can you imagine??

What do older people do?? Maybe sit somewhere, and eat, and talk.

What do youngsters do?? Of course, besides than sitting somewhere, relaxing, eating and talking, we would do something slightly more adventurous.

And plus, our *cough* mobility is slightly (just slightly) higher, right??

My mom said that Miss Pow (not sure about the spelling) is going. God. Our Maths teacher. Nightmare. And a discipline teacher. And I ...... no. Remember. The views. Yes.

She said that Teacher Cheng Ley Sim is going too!!!! She is SOOOO nice. She looks very, very young and perfectly gorgeous for her age. (Not that she's very old or anything) And she is perfectly slim. And she can dress very well. High class, like Pei En said.

(Yes lah, we always notice those kind of things)

And even though she never taught us before, we all like her immensely because ... you can just see. She looks nice and friendly. Unlike ... unlike a certain SOMEONE who keeps scolding and scolding us non-stop. Errgh.

Our Maths teacher last year is going too. OH MY GOD. She's ..... I don't know. Sunset. Sunrise. Sunset. Sunrise. Sunset. Sunrise.

And .... *shrugs* Honestly, I really don't care, as long as I can GO there. But of course it'd be better if I'm going with friends or cousins (Ee Leng, touched or not??) I love beaches. Especially ones with pristine white sand, turquoise waters, a cool breeze and a blazing sun.

And of course with lots of gorgeous guys and girls (preferably in bikinis) on the beach.

I need to work on my tan!! I'm turning paler and paler and ... BLERRGH I hate pale skin. I like tanned, golden skin, especially when slathered with some kind of oil or glitter that made it look like THIS:



Okay I know this photo appeared on my blog for thousands of times already but still ... I like it what!! So hot.

See? See her skin tone?? So nice. Maybe it's the lighting or editing, but who cares. Don't you think that tanned skin look healthier?? And not to mention prettier. Ahhhhhhh.

I wanna go!!!!

But if I have the chance, I'd like to go to the Caribbean first because it's probably prettier than Bali.

*And I can pretend that I'm the gorgeous Keira Knightley, making out with the equally gorgeous Orlando Bloom. Ahhh.

Like I said, it doesn't hurt to fantasize.

But I haven't even been to all the islands in Malaysia. Where I live. *SIGH*

OK, I need to stop babbling. Bye-bye!!






Arrgh. I wanna go.

I wanna go.

OK, bye-bye.




Wait. Anyone wants to sponsor me the trip??

OK lah, bye-bye.

=)


craving chocolate kisses ..
9:23 PM


♥ Wednesday, July 30, 2008 ♥
Just A Dream

30 July 2008

I had a most peculiar dream the night before.

In the dream, our school is located behind my house, and then the school field is located a row away in front of my house. Don't get it?? What I mean is, there are two rows of houses, my row and the row opposite me, clamped between the school and the school field.

[See, I told you it was weird.]

And instead of the boring tall "coconut-like" trees that our school has in reality, the school field was surrounded by large, shady trees and pretty, neat, white stone pavements. And the grass was surprisingly smooth and well-kept. Unlike our school in real life. And not a blackbird was in sight.

Everyone was at school, both the morning and afternoon session. And my sister and I were at home for some reason.

Then a bell rang for assembly. So my sister and I were standing in the porch, and we could see all the students from the school walking past our house toward the field. I don't know, we don't have our assemblies at the field but in the hall instead, but ..... well, dreams are dreams.

So after quite a long while, I walked toward the field for the assembly as well, but I don't know how, I turned up in a big, amazing ballroom located beside the school field. There were balloons inside, and a few of my friends were there. I don't know, I thought they were supposed to be at assembly?

[Actually, the place reminds me of Manhattan, NYC. I haven't been to Manhattan before, but yeah, I saw photos, watched movies, read books, and a grand, elegant building looming beside a lush green park ... It all just sound kind of familiar, like what I read in the books. Maybe not NYC, just somewhere. Maybe it's because I want to go there so much .]

After that, I went to the field only to find that the "field" has turned into a vast hall with blue chairs and giant double doors made of wood. Many fat Malay guys in songkoks and formal wear were there. I was standing outside the doors with my sister, and someone, I don't know who, warned us not to go inside.

All the students were there too, all standing up, which probably meant that the assembly has ended. Then I saw Wendy from our class. [Don't know why it was Wendy ... weird] And she told me that I was lucky I missed the assembly. She said that the fat Malay guys were actually ... I don't know, some people to do with discipline, that the school invited over.

Wendy told me that the students' hairs and nails were checked by the Malay guys, and they pretty much checked everything else, from top-to-toe. She said they were asked to take off their shoes and socks as well, to check their toenails, to see if they are short and neat and unpolished.

I know, I know, crazy right.

No, I don't know whether they were asked to take off their clothes and underwear to check if there were any nipples or belly piercings or not.

*sigh*

You see?? Our stupid school rules made me crazy.

Tell me, which normal person dreams of stuff like that?? Huh??!?

All I can say is : thank God it was just a dream and not reality. Phew.


craving chocolate kisses ..
4:19 PM


♥ Saturday, July 26, 2008 ♥
When I Grow Up ....

26 July 2008



I swear I'm totally addicted to the song When I Grow Up by the Pussycat Dolls.

It's catchy, and it has a nice beat!!

Even though the lyrics are a bit crap and weird, it's still sort of true to me. Yeah, I want to be famous, I want to be a star, I want to be in the movies. Who wouldn't want to be?

And although you might say you hate the Pussycat Dolls, somewhere deep inside you'd probably want to be like them, right?? You can't say you're not just a teeny bit jealous and envious ....

Come on. They have great bods, they are loaded, they are sexy, and they can seriously dance.

Which girl in the world wouldn't want to have perfect bodies like theirs?

Go watch the video of When I Grow Up!! I like the dance at the end!! It's hotttt.


craving chocolate kisses ..
1:07 PM


♥ Friday, July 25, 2008 ♥
Girls Go Gaga Over Boys ...

25 July 2008

(random stuff at the bottom of the post, again)

Girls go gaga over .... guess what??

Not pretty, sparkly stuff, not gorgeous wedding dresses and glittery tiaras, not glam and famous celebrities, not cash (well, not this time), not Orlando Bloom, not Juicy Couture, not girls and certainly not boys .....

But wait a minute, I'll get to that later on.

Uhhm, apparently, someone truly important to our school (I don't even know his name *face reddens*) just passed away and the ..... funeral procession? was today.

The whole school, almost the whole school had to go out and stand beside the streets to ... I don't know, to ..... just something to do with mourning, something out of respect and gratitude ....

Because he is someone who made our school so ..... *clears throat* successful.

All of us Traffic Wardens had to stand at the front in a neat row to ensure that no crazy students ran onto the road (who'd want to do that??!?), and be the .... as some people call it : "Student Barrier". Some of us, including me, had to hold a huge banner. (and of course I don't know what was written on it *face reddens again*)

We stood there for almost an hour. Thank God it wasn't too sunny or else I'd probably faint. My arms were so tired and numb for holding the banner for so long. Other people only had to hold the banner with one hand, but unlucky me, I had to hold it up with two hands.

I totally regretted for changing places with Ming Hooi. I wanted to hold the banner because I thought it was better than standing there and blocking students, but, turned out that I was wrong. On the plus (NOT) side, the photographers were all taking photos of the banner which means that our faces were probably inside the photos as well. Fuck.

I only hope they don't plaster a huge photo of it in the newspaper. If I were wearing something nice .... *snaps into dream* say, a gorgeous Valentino gown and a pair of Christian Louboutin shoes with the trademark red soles and a Chanel clutch, then of course I want my photo to be printed on the newspapers. The bigger the photo, the longer the article, the better.

But God forbid, we were all wearing the truly disgusting, revolting, horrible black-and-white ugly ass uniform with the weirdly deformed hats. Which explains why such an attention-loving and vain person like me would turn away from the cameras.

So, I was saying ...

Girls go gaga over .... REPORTERS and PHOTOGRAPHERS.

Can you imagine?? When they saw the photographers, they squealed and waved their hands in the air to get their attention. When the photographers walked away, just like that, I heard someone say that : "Yerr, they didn't take photos of us ..." Which really made me wonder. Are you some kind of celebrity?? Do you actually think they are here to take photos of you?? How hilarious.

They were all pointing and saying : "Ehh, look over there, faster, the photographer's taking our photos!!" "Tomorrow our faces are gonna hit the newspapers!!" Rui Mei said that she even saw someone who POSED for the cameras. Hello?? This is not some kind of photo shoot, it's a funeral procession, for God's sake. Those people who posed must be too desperate for attention.

Who'd want to have their posed photos shown on the newspapers during a FUNERAL PROCESSION? If it's a charity event, well, okay. If it's a star-studded event, fine. But a .... funeral procession???! (Okay I have to stop repeating those words)

And we're not supposed to POSE anyway. Even if the ... uhhm, the ... errm, vehicles, you know, with the dead person's family and close friends inside, lorries with thousands of flowers and the most important thing, the ... coffin haven't arrived, it's still pretty rude to pose right? Okay, I'll just say, smiling at the cameras is not big deal because our headmistress probably did the same thing too. But posing?? That's a bit too much.

But at least everyone was quiet when the vehicles went past.

It was kind of sad. I had tears in my eyes. =(

Even though I don't really like our school that much. Oh, sod it. Even though I completely hate our school, I still must say thank you to him for ... for everything he did.

R.I.P~







Well, OK, the tears weren't exactly because I was sad that he died, it was just that I was very tired and kept yawning, and there were many other stupid vehicles that emitted black, smelly, foul gas. *splutters* No wonder I kept tearing.

*****************


Mirror, mirror hanging on the wall ....

See, I said that I'm vain. Haha.

Eh my smile very fake right.

Eh my hair very short right.

Eh my mirror very pretty right.

Eh I'm very pretty also right.

Oh fuck, a sequin dropped off!! *scowls*


Pretty?

You know I love you.

Youuu. You'd probably don't know who you are ...

=P


craving chocolate kisses ..
8:25 PM


♥ Tuesday, July 22, 2008 ♥
I Don't Like and I NEVER Will Like ...

22 July 2008

LONG POST AHEAD!!!
(Skip to the bottom of the post if you like mushrooms)

Like what??

You, of course.

OK, no, not you. Just joking.

(Yes, obviously I'm not in a normal state. I don't crack lame "jokes" when I'm normal.)

What I don't like and never, ever will like is :

Our school, of course.

If you're normal, you'll feel the same. Besides than the word nuts, I really can't find any other suitable words to describe our school. Well, of course, with the exception of the synonyms of the word nuts. Which are ... errm, a lot, to be exact.

Our school had an assembly early yesterday morning. *yawns*

Preach. Lecture. Preach. Lecture. Preach . Lec-ec-ttt ..... *snores*

It is damn boring you know.

Even a FLY is more intriguing than listening to the teachers droning on about some boring, tedious stuff they always repeat in every assembly.

Yes, really.

A fly was flying around the place we were sitting cross-legged, Indian Style.

(No chairs. Arrgh, can you imagine?? The assembly lasts for at least one and a half hours, and we have to sit on the floor, CROSS-LEGGED. I wouldn't be surprised if someone toppled over when she stood up from such a long sit on the floor.)

And the stupid fly kept landing on people's hair. Including mine.

So everyone was giggling and swatting the fly away, then searching for it again, to see whose head it had landed on. And if that is more interesting than the teachers talking ... well, you get the picture.

Back to why I hate our school so much.

It is getting ridiculous!! You know what the teacher said?? She said she's going to give the discipline teachers a camera. What for?? To take photos of people who has "illegal" hair (only illegal in our school), then to post it up for the whole school to see during the next assembly.

You know, that's insane. That. Is. Totally. Completely. Insane.

Not to mention embarrassing. Would you like it if your photo was posted up for the whole school to see?? How humiliating.

And you know, our school does not allow the students to pin their hair up. When I say up, I mean ... err, comb your fringe (or the front part of your hair) upwards and pin it at the back or at the top of your head. Get what I mean??

I'll just post a photo of it :



What?? What can possibly be wrong with hair like that??

I think it looks neat and simple, AND it keeps your hair off your face.

But our school, our crazy school, say it's illegal. And the teacher actually asked someone whose hair was pinned up like that to stand up in front of the whole school. And she asked the poor girl to do a little twirl for everyone to see. THAT IS DAMN FUCKING UNNECESSARY OKAY.

I hope one day someone will ask HER to do something completely stupid and mortifying, and the whole school will be there to gape, point and laugh at her. Hey, even if there's something you don't like on some people, you DO NOT ask them to stand up and do a little twirl to "show off" in front of hundreds of other students, okay??

Do you even KNOW the meaning "embarrassing"??

Do you actually think that it's the best way to make someone change and follow the school rules by humiliating that someone?

Damn.

Anyway. I STILL don't get it. I STILL don't get what's with the long hair, short hair thing. Wondered about it for thousands of times but I still don't understand.

And not to mention why combs and liquids are not allowed. Oh, and beverages that contain sugar. Scream INSANE, anyone?? There are even rules about the "prim and proper" white school shoes we have to wear. I thought that those shoes are so normal, so ugly, so .... that it is impossible to actually have some rules about them. But no. The shoes, the parts made of cloth have to be more than the parts made of rubber, and ......

ERRRGH.

SHE said that if we hate the school so much, then transfer!! Go on!! Transfer!!

Why, if I had my way I wouldn't be studying at this sucky school anymore. If I had my way I wouldn't even be living in Malaysia. But sadly, no, I'm still stuck in this lousy school with the lousy rules.

If we ALL had our ways there wouldn't be more than a hundred students left in this school. Even Hui Jing, such a goody student, declared that the school rules are too much.

I swear, instead of a school, it feels more like a locked-up building full of girls who badly want freedom, who badly want to leave the place forever. At least, I feel like that. But there are two more, TWO more years until I can finally get out of this beastly school.

I won't miss this school. I WON'T.

What's there to miss anyway. I certainly wouldn't miss the dirty, cobweb-ridden toilets and the thousands of disgusting blackbirds flying around. I wouldn't miss the horrible food in the school canteen either.

But there are plenty of super-nice teachers I would miss. And ... yeah, that's about it. Nothing else.

I would miss my friends too, but they aren't exactly part of the school, are they?

Hah. If everyone transferred (which will never happen *sigh*), we will see how the teacher survives.

Ahhhhh I don't really want to continue blabbing about our stupid school anymore. Why did I waste so much time to talk about this school when there are so many other nicer things to talk about, I don't know.

**************

Some truly adorable things I found from VieCouture for you to see :


Mushroom Mini Lamps

Cute or not?? CUTE OR NOT??!

God, I want one. Or two. Or three. Or all of them.

*wide-eyed look* My birthday's coming soon!!! In ...... *aherm* November. Which is .... 4 months away. (DON'T KILL ME!!)

It means you have ample time to start saving your money.

I think one mushroom costs ... RM30?? I think. I THINK. It's US$9. So ... yeah, it should be around RM30. And you can get it from Brando, wherever and whatever that might be.

*winks* Remember!! =P


Mini Mushroom Cleaners

Also very cute right?? RIGHT?!

I don't know how they do so, but they are supposed to clean up dust, ashes and so on.

AND they'd make a good decorating ornament.


Mushroom Candies

Oh my God. How cute are they??

Okay this post is getting a tad bit too long. I'm going to watch Fly Tales now!!

Fly Tales : A cartoon about a round, super-cute fly. I watched it when I was very, very young. Now I found the cartoon on YouTube, and I'm very excited!!! It's very cute, I tell you. Heeheh.



OK, byeee!! =D


craving chocolate kisses ..
7:57 PM


♥ Friday, July 18, 2008 ♥
It Completely Got My Heart~

18 July 2008

I can't wait till November!!

When all the beastly exams are over, when the glorious two-month-holiday starts, when there are no more dull projects or homework, when there are no annoying teachers and prefects who sniff around you all day - checking your hair, nails, socks, et cetera - when the days become Rotten-Pear-Trapezium-Fucker-free, when I get to see some certain people everyday, when everything just spells fun, fun, F-U-N!!

(Err, maybe it will spell b-o-r-i-n-g too, just maybe)

And best of all ....

Our class is organizing a trip to Genting & KL!!

*sigh* Actually it is not 100% confirmed yet as there are a lot of things to plan, like, asking permission from the school, renting buses, booking hotels, arranging the itinerary ......

I really, really hope it will happen!! I don't want to get my hopes too high (it's high enough as it is) as I'm scared of disappointments like this. Got yourself overexcited, then everything just went *poof*!!!! Nothing else. Nothing more.

I'll cry.

How nice is it to go somewhere, even if it is somewhere you had already been to before, with a bunch of your friends?? It is going to be so great!! If the trip really happens, that is.

Anyway.

I was talking about wanting money in the previous post.

Some weeks ago I found out that my mom sponsored a .... well, some sort of Chinese Orchestra instrument, don't know what it's called in English and I don't want to type it in Chinese because I know, you know, everyone who's anyone (to me) knows that I hate Chinese.

Oh, they should know that I hate Malay too. And Maths. And History. And ... pretty much every subject that we have in school except English and Art. Which is why I don't see any point in continuing my studies next year as I don't even LIKE the damned subjects. Physics. Chemistry. Biology. God, how boring. I hate studying about things I have absolutely zero interest in. End of story. Ditto.

Okay, back to the instrument.

Why did she not give the money to me?? Instead she splurged it on an instrument for the school. Damn.

But I know, it's a good thing, it's a good thing. *tries harder to convince myself* It's a good thing.

Yes. It's a good thing.

BUT IT'S NOT!!

Why didn't she give the money to me??? *sobs* I can buy four mobile phones already!!! And four cameras. And maybe two laptops. And hundreds of clothes. And thousands (okay, maybe not thousands) of Juicy Couture products!!

Shut up. I am allowed to fantasize.

Hah. Like my mom will ever give me the money even if she did not buy the instrument.

*************

I want the bag. I want the bag. I WANT THE BAG!!!

Besides the many other things I want. I wish I'm rich enough to buy the whole line of Juicy Couture products.

Besides the many other brands of things I want. I wish I'm rich enough to buy all the gorgeous things in the world.

*sigh*

Money IS the root to all evil.

Or rather, DESIRE is the root to all evil. Yep.

*****************

Sum 41 - With Me



I can't believe I just found this song when it was uploaded thousands of years ago. May, to be exact.

I first heard this song in Gossip Girl last year, when Blair was in the backseat of the limo with Chuck ..... *winks*

This song is and forever will be one of my favorite songs!!

This song makes me think of Ee Leng & Singapore. Sometimes listening to it will make me feel like crying although it is not a sad song.

**********

SCREAMS! Can't wait for Gossip Girl Season 2~

I saw lots of gorgeous photos of the GG cast on-set in Hamptons for the summer ... *sizzles*

I like Blair's new highlighted hair and cute printed dresses!

I like Serena's outfits too, have always liked her hair and pretty much everything else about her.

I like everything about Nate too, I guess most girls do! Everyone will get to see his naked torso in Season 2!! Drooling much? Yeah, he is that hot.

I really want Serena and Nate to get together!! They'd make such gorgeous couple. Although people say that Dan and Serena are made for each other ... well, they ARE a couple in real-life, so Serena and Nate should be together in the SHOW.




craving chocolate kisses ..
3:33 PM


♥ Tuesday, July 15, 2008 ♥
Desires. Craves. Wants.

15 July 2008

Okay.

I am going to save every single cent from this very minute onwards.

I am going to pack my own meals, never buy water even if I'm thirsty (I will drink from the drain instead ... ok lah, the school got free water supply), and if selling my shit can get me money ... I will do it!

Even if it means I have to scoop it out from the toilet bowl with my hands. I will might do it.

I'll just soak my hand in ... Dettol?? for the rest of my life.

I must NOT spend any money on clothes (well maybe just one ... okay, maybe not, I can't!), shoes, and definitely not BOOKS. I must not listen to my stupid instincts, even if it's telling me to buy a yummy, only-10- cents sweet. You see, I can save money AND keep a healthy diet at the same time!

I must not spend money on food (unless if I am hungry and is not going home until after two hours or later. If I'm going home in around one hour, then I'll bear with the hunger.) or beverages (not even if I'm thirsty since I can get free water from school).

I want to sell some of my books!! Any ideas on how I should sell them??

Damn. I think I can get around RM170 if I sold five of my books. If I sold them all .... But no way am I getting rid of my Gossip Girl books, they are too precious. Far, far too precious.

OH FUCK!! The second Gossip Girl (The Carlyles) book is coming out in October!!

So, it means I MUST not buy the book. I will buy it ... maybe next year.

Oh, shut up, shut up, shut up.




craving chocolate kisses ..
9:28 PM


♥ Sunday, July 13, 2008 ♥
Awww. =(

13 July 2008

Not really looking forward to tomorrow anymore.

*sigggh*




craving chocolate kisses ..
8:21 PM


♥ Saturday, July 12, 2008 ♥
Farts and Whatnots ~

12 July 2008

I don't like family gatherings.

I really don't like family gatherings.

Unless said family members are above 13 and below 25 years of age. Any younger or older than that, well I'm sorry. I find it awkward to actually be on the same piece of ground with you. With the exception of one or two well-liked aunts and uncles.

The young cousins.

Many years ago, I actually look forward to their coming over to our house. We play games, we sing songs, we do normal stuff children do. They like to come over, because they want to see us, they want to play with us.

Now, they still come over as often as they did, but no, they don't like coming here to see us anymore. Guess why they like to come over so much.

It is because they will have the chance to play computer games.

Seriously.

It's the only thing they do when they are here.

Well, besides arguing and fighting with each other over the computer.

They are always FIGHTING over who should be playing the computer. When A sat down for only like, two minutes (mommy's time limit : 5 minutes), B will complain that A has already played for ten minutes. When B plopped down in front of the computer, and played for way more than ten minutes, and C complained a bit, B will say that : "It's not even two minutes yet, okay??"

Then later one of them, A or C will cry to their mommy : "I didn't play AT ALL!!"

Definition of AT ALL : More than fifteen minutes. Possibly more.

Yet nobody is cruel enough to ask them to shut up, stop arguing and scoot off.

It's fucking annoying.

Which is the reason why I locked my adjoining bathroom door and bedroom door, and hid under the duvets until ..... much as I like to, I can't very well hide in my bedroom for the whole day, right? So I only came out for dinner, and that was it.

Oh, okay. I will admit that I also took the chance to shoot them a truly disdainful glance. Of course they were sitting in front of the computer with their eyes glued to the surface.

I regret the day we first let them touch the smooth surfaces of the keyboard.

The older cousins.


I don't like the way they always ... scrutinize everything about you.

First thing they say : "Oh!! You are awake!! Ahh. Nail polish!!" "Wah. Your hair so long, it covers your whole face, the school didn't catch meh?"

It's sort of like X-Ray. They notice everything. Oh, wait, no, they don't notice the extra tires and layers of fat OR the new gorgeous abs you have on your body as it is concealed by your clothes. They don't notice that you sprouted a pimple on your forehead. They don't notice that you are having a sore throat.

They just notice stupid, stupid things.

Nail polish, so what?? Hair covering face, so what??

I really don't need anyone's approval, especially not theirs. I don't need to impress people who do not matter. Honestly, so what?? So I'm the bad girl with polished nails and long hair.

Hah. I also hate some certain cousins who always compare my sister and I.

Okay, they don't actually compare ... straightforwardly. Like, they would say my sister's hair is short enough to see her face. So nice. Then they would say my hair is like something something, so long, can't see my face, blah, blah, blah.

Since my sister is such a goody, she sure loves all our cousins and all our cousins probably love her. Good girl with short, short hair (that the school approves of, might I add), short and unpolished nails, and not even ear piercings. Ahhhh.

Even though the cousins don't say everything in a mean way, I still don't like it. Hey. Maybe you don't like polished nails. It doesn't meet your approval. BUT it doesn't mean that other people don't like it. It doesn't mean that other people cannot polish their nails just because you didn't.

Ohhh there are so many things I dislike about cousins coming over.

Although I really love Chinese New Year and all the money I get, I sort of hate it because it means family gatherings. Not nice.

Arrrgh, they were so impolite just now!!

We were having dinner, and my aunt, who just had a baby, started talking about how the baby farts, yes, FARTS, and how disgustingly smelly his farts always are. GROSS. Hello, I was eating, okay?? It sort of made me wanna hurl all the things I ate over the table.

And my mom and dad also chatted along enthusiastically like babies' stinky farts are the most intriguing thing in the world.

When we were young my mom used to tell us how impolite it is if we talk about shit when we are eating.

You tell me, what's the difference between farts and shits? Except that one is a kind of gas, the other a kind of solid. Well, unless it's those watery kinds of shit, then it's a half-solid half-liquid.

Yuck.

I hope you are eating now.

But my description of shits were lousy. Not that I actually want it to be more ... detailed. Aherm.

*********

Had quite a happy day!!

Heeee. Secret. =P

*attempting to look and sound mysterious but failing miserably*

The only bad thing that happened today was a horrible, truly horrible tummy upset. For the whole afternoon. I could barely walk straight. Don't know what was wrong. Maybe I ate something wrong.

Anyway, I'm quite looking forward to Monday, though I really don't know why.

P.S./ You know?? Someone from CO actually gave up the chance of going to Bali (BALI YOU KNOW!!) because we are having an important competition during the end-of-year-holidays. God. Talk about sacrificing ....

BALI.





Such a gorgeous, gorgeoussss place.

Damn, I still find it hard to believe that the person gave up the chance to go to Bali just because of CO. So good of her. But I hate her for having the chance to go to Bali. *envious look*

(SHUT UP FUCKING COUSINS WILL YOU? SHOUTING AND ARGUING LIKE THIS IS YOUR HOUSE, DON'T YOU HAVE ANY MANNERS? WTF.)


craving chocolate kisses ..
8:45 PM


♥ Monday, July 07, 2008 ♥
Cursed July

7 July 2008

Yes. I think July is definitely cursed or jinxed.

More and more injuries are happening to people I know!! There are like, 6 people in Chinese Orchestra that are suffering from injuries. I thought there were only like, 3 or 4 people, but turns out there are 6. God.

Today, a close someone actually injured her arm.

And that close someone happened to be my SISTER.

I don't know how it happened as I wasn't an eye-witness, but she told me later that she ... dislocated her arm. Or do you say dislocated her arm bone. I don't know, I am completely clueless in this kind of thing. She was playing netball earlier this morning, and ... blah, blah, blah, she was trying to catch a ... say, "high-speed-high-momentum ball", and ... blah, blah, blah, she felt her bone crack (or something of the sort), and ... blah, blah, blah, she was sent to a hospital, or was it a clinic, and ... blah, blah, blah.

The doctor told her her soft muscle tissue or something of the sort was TORN.

God, imagine the PAIN. Fuck.

But thank God it was her left hand.

(Damn I sound so enthusiastic. Like the injury was the best thing that could ever happen.)

But really, thank God it was her left hand. She writes with her right hand, and she's an athlete, so she ... uhh, well, she needs her right hand in the sport she plays. Well of course she needs her left hand too, but the main thing is her right hand, so, it was a relief, really. And it's not like it's PERMANENT, is it?? *gulps*

I used to have a friend in primary school whose leg muscles were torn when we was ... hurdling? Yowwcch. So he couldn't hurdle or run for quite a long time. Sigh.

Anyway. I heard that a Form 4 Chinese Orchestra member injured her leg while playing basketball, and she's staying at home for nine days. And turns out that the "minor" accident the Form 2 Traffic Warden had is not "minor" at all. I heard that her bone was fractured, and it can only heal in SIX WEEKS TIME.

SIX FUCKING WEEKS. God, why is the world so unfair?

Funny how a normal thing like playing basketball for several minutes can end up in having to suffer for several days or even weeks, isn't it?

I hope everyone will be more careful from now on ....

I certainly don't want my friends or family to get hurt, and I certainly, most definitely don't want SOMEONE to get hurt.

=(

**********

The prefect demerited me for having long hair today. *groans* What the fucccck.

I find it terribly unfair. SUE YI!!! You were seriously lucky, you know.

So, I had my haircut today, and I can't say I like it very much. I actually wanted a certain someone to help me cut my hair but instead that person went off to cut Yann Ying's hair. Arrgh. FISH.

And you know what??

THE ROTTEN PEAR FUCKER. She actually COMPLAINED that my hair at the sides are still longer than the back.

Eh. I was NOT planning to cut my hair one okay. I was plainly, simply going to keep my long hair and avoid her for as long as it takes for her rotten pear brains to forget. And now?? I cut my hair already, and it is already soooo much more shorter, she still opened her smelly mouth and BLAB???

And she flashed me a motherly, kindly, RARE smile.

Motherly and kindly my arse. But it was indeed rare.

Her face was all scrunched up like a petal (an ugly, dried one obviously), and her eyes looked like they were purposely crinkled, if you know what I mean. Crinkled until all I could see were two damn tiny black SLITS. (Hah. This word makes me feel better. Slits. Makes her sound like a slimy snake.) Her pear/trapezium-like hair kept bouncing and bouncing when she talked, and her mouth was clamped tight shut without showing any teeth when she smiled.

Million-dollar smile, NOT.

Ying Nee said I should have told her ...

"Cut my hair already and it's still not enough?? Aboh you want my hair to be so short and ugly like YOURS meh??"

Shit. I would have said that if I could. Pity she knows my mum so I cannot say those kind of things.

Damn. I fucking HATEEEEE her.

Why, why do I tend to see people that I want to avoid many many times, and never see the person I really, really want to see?? *sigh*


craving chocolate kisses ..
10:26 PM


♥ Sunday, July 06, 2008 ♥
School Concert

6 July 2008

It was the school concert last night!

I feel so sad that it's all over. No more getting out of boring classes for rehearsal. No more fooling around and being crazy. I'm gonna miss it a lot!! *sigh*

Anyway. Reached school at around 2:30 p.m. for preparations and a last-minute rehearsal. Time flew, and after we had a truly disgusting, oily dinner the school so generously prepared, we had to change and make-up.

MAKE-UP.

At first lots of us weren't planning to put on make-up, but the teachers practically forced us all to do so. I mean, I love make-up, making-up is fun, but for the school concert?? I honestly don't see the point. It's not a very grand, huge event, is it??

Worse still, the make-up was to be put on by TEACHERS. God forbid. Thank goodness I found someone to help me put it on before the teachers drag me off like a lamb going for slaughter.

But the "someone" who put on my make-up .... turned out to be Shi Yin.

Oh God. Help me. =P

I went to Shen Ni (or however her name is spelled) for a "touch-up" later, just in case Shi Yin really made me look like some horrible mutant.

Took a lot of photos today!! Time for you to drool over them again.


Lee Mei & I

Before I was made up into a doll an alien. Kind of.


Shi Yin & I ; Shi Yin & my sister

After I was made up into an alien. Kind of.

Yes. SHE is the horrendously cruel, evil-but-very-cute person who put on my make-up.


Tessy & I

She looked weird with make-up on. A bit ... unlike her. =P

She is usually more ... *scratches hair* how do you say it?? More ... boyish, and a bit ... err, rough?? I don't know how to say it. Just not as ... gentle as a normal girl. Not that we all are actually gentle.

She is fucking tall, and I hate her for it. Arrrgh. =(


Tessy, Chiew Na & I

I feel even shorter than I actually am when I stand with them. I feel like .....


The Petronas Twin Towers, Kuala Lumpur

I feel like the "bridge" in the middle, when the both of them are the super-tall towers.

*sobs*

I'm still shorter than they are when I wear 3-inch high heels okay.

So, you see, they really are that tall. Or maybe I'm just very very short. =(


Rui Mei, Hui Jing & I

I look soooo weird. They look so nice and casual, and I look so different, in the hideous "Chili" or "Christmas Outfit" as we all like to call it, and all made up like an alien.


Hui Jing & I

Arrrgh!! I hate her for looking so nice in every single photo she took.

*glares at her enviously*


Rachel - The Queen of Ugly Faces & I

SUNSTROKE!!! =P


My sister & I

We don't look alike right?? I don't understand why so many people say we do. Errgh.


Teacher Tan Meng Ee, Chiew Na, Jia Yi & I

Ahhhh. *coughs* High heels.


Top Left : Me, Yi Ling, Chiew Na
Bottom Left : Wen Huey, Hsieh Ying, Shi Yin

Wen Huey's hair!! So funny. Kind of looks like she naturally has red hair, then she dyed it black, and her red roots are showing.

Damn. She can actually compete her vainness with me.

When she looked in the mirror, she declared that she looked very pretty.

I told her I looked prettier than her.

Then she said she's the PRETTIEST.

=_=


Meeeee

There were pretty glitters in my hair, and my hair was sprayed with purple and pink (or was it red?) colors!!

So gorgeous!!! Like a two-colored rainbow.

Thanks, Jing Ru. =D


My hair

The colors were really nice at first, but the above photo was taken after hours, so the colors were faded. Aww.


=)

VANITY - It's something one (or only me) cannot get rid of.



LOOK AT THE EYELASHES!

So pretty right. I asked Shen Ni not to put too much, so it looked kind of short. But it sure was a torture to have to force your eyes open until the mascara dries off. It made my eyes tear.

*sigh* Suffer for beauty.

And hah!! I still remember how when Shih Yin was curling my eyelashes, she accidentally
"clamped" my eyelids with the eyelash curler. OUCCCCCH. It made my eyes tear too.

And my feet were so painful after running around in the 3-inch high heels. Yowwwch.

The performance was ... well, like that. Heard our teacher said that nobody can hear a thing below the stage when we were performing because the audience were damn noisy. Even heard some one said that an adult couple went home in a huff because they couldn't enjoy the concert, thanks to all the noisy people.

Hurray.

=_=

***********

I'm going to burst!!! I'm hoping that I can avoid the fucking Miss Trapezium (from the previous post), but with every corner I turn, she's there. Damn.

My friend said she's NICE. My fragrant (or smelly) arse, she's NOT okay. But the same friend said that her hair is like a deformed pear.

Ha-deee-ha!!! *points and laughs at Miss Rotten Pear/Miss Trapezium*


craving chocolate kisses ..
11:24 AM


♥ Friday, July 04, 2008 ♥
I'd Be Damned

4 July 2008

I wasn't going to post an entry today, but I just need to release my anger.

I was fucking PISSED today. SHE burst my happy pink bubble.

Why are teenagers so stressed nowadays?? I'd be damned if it isn't because of school.

Why can't teenagers go to school in peace, have fun, learn new things, and go home happily?? I'd be damned if it isn't because of some certain school teachers and endless, unreasonable amounts of homework.

Okay, I don't have unreasonable amounts of homework, but the "some certain school teachers" part?? I certainly agree.

Most teenagers are only happy to go to school to see their friends. Which, I have to say, I agree 100% too. I don't think I'd go to school without my friends. It's because of friends that I can still bear with stupid school rules.

I'm gonna blab.

A certain disgusting, much-hated, inhuman, short teacher with hair that kind of resembles a trapezium, only utterly deformed and horrible, (I think trapeziums are one of the nicest shapes, but not hers) caught me for having long hair. Not long, just longer than some people's. She caught me some time ago, and now she caught me again.

I don't blame her for catching me, because it is her duty. Instead, I appreciate her responsibility.








Nah. That was just an ass-kissing sentence.

You know, our crazy school might even track down students' blogs just to see if they are mentioned like how crazy fans might mention Paris Hilton. In fact, I think they already tracked down some. Bah. One word : LAME. They are only causing themselves some unnecessary wounds. Why investigate to find out something bad about yourself??

Do they have too much free time??

Why don't they use the free time to go clean the toilets?? To think about some certain things that actually NEED to be done?? Huh?? Or at least get rid of all the fucking crows in our school?? Aggh. How unhygienic. The crows fly from one table to another in the canteen. They peck at the rubbish in the dustbin, they pick up some leftover, dropped food on the tables, and they shit everywhere. Why?? Why don't they spend their way-too-much free time to do some things that actually MATTER?

It sure is better than to check and see what we wrote about them. It sure is better than to check and spy on somebody's life, and maybe, take that somebody off for some special counseling because she wrote a rude word in her online diary.

I have wondered for ages. What is wrong with having long hair?? Long hair is not exactly very unhygienic like ... say, long nails, maybe?? And long hair doesn't exactly affect our studies, does it?? God, what is WRONG with our school??

I am so fucking pissed.

AHHHH.

Back to Miss Trapezium. She threatened to cut off my hair if I don't cut it off on Monday. This shouldn't be allowed. Oh, no, it shouldn't. So they are teachers. They are human. We are students. We are human. Humans should treat each other equally.

Teachers have long hair. Why can't we have long hair?? I mean, hello, what's the difference?? If long hair affects our studies, will it not affect the teacher's career?? Come on. Why not?? It's the same thing, isn't it?? They say that if we have long hair, we will care too much about our hair to actually focus and concentrate in class. I call that a fucking excuse, a bunch of hocus-pocus. What about teachers?? They have long hair, they will care too much about their hair, i.e., they don't want their hair covered with chalk, and they can't focus and concentrate in teaching students.

Damn.

We are girls, okay. GIRLS. What do they want us to be, bald?? I actually think Miss Trapezium will look better bald than with her deformed coif. Yucks. I fucking hate her "I am so superior" look. Superior, my arse.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK.

I don't even know where to start. I can never ever finish complaining about our lousy school. Our school is actually sort of famous (God knows why), and many people from primary schools want to get into our school. Once they're in, they regret it. Like us. We used to have more students in our form, but in a year, actually 8 (or much, much more) transferred schools.

Oh, how I envy them.

Fucking Miss Trapezium, just you wait. One day I'll get back at you. If I can ever find more than 20 persons (teachers, family, workers, and graduates excluded) who actually likes you ...

I'D BE FUCKING DAMNED.

P.S./ School concert tomorrow. *groans* I think the fucker will be there tomorrow. Make that FUCKERS because there are more than one of them. I think there are three. Or four. Errgh. I hate them. They made me hate school.


craving chocolate kisses ..
7:16 PM


♥ Wednesday, July 02, 2008 ♥
The Curse of The Black Pearl Month ....

2 July 2008

Is the end of June and the start of July fucking CURSED??

Why are there so many people I know (or don't really know) that had accidents?? Three. THREE people with bandaged ankles. Yes. All ankles. One fell down from a motorcycle. Another fell down from the stairs. Yet another got hit by a car.

And that's not all.

Now our DOG injured his ankle. Okay, maybe not his ankle as he doesn't have an ankle. His right leg. God, there are blood everywhere downstairs. The GORE. Not a pleasant sight. Not exactly a pleasant smell either.



Please, God, don't let anything bad happen to him, like what happened to poor B. =(



Why must so many bad things happen when I'm feeling so disgustingly happy??

I just feel so happy today, even though I spent almost an hour sitting alone on a truly uncomfortable stone bench, waiting for my friends, ants crawling up my hand and legs, having to be on the same ground as the China Princess, and pretending to read a fucking CHINESE book that I don't understand.

Laughed a lot today!! I sooo love laughing like someone insane. Laughing ... like there's no tomorrow. And many people from CO managed to make me laugh like that.

God, call me stupid or anything but I really can't think of a single reason why I used to like THEM more than I liked "THEM".

*shakes head* I must be mental.

I hate myself for being so fine and happy when so many other people are feeling the exact opposite.


craving chocolate kisses ..
9:16 PM